This was the test, to see if Grandma could still do her job with a little one in tow. Never did God or an angel come to me in my sleep delivering a message of parenthood astonishment - no declarations that in my advanced years I would give birth to a child...whew...can I just say "Thank You". Now, don't mistake that for a dislike of children or babies. Had I followed God's plans for me in the first place and really thought about 'who, what, where, when, why and how' I was getting married there is a 100% chance I would have made a different choice...Ahhh...another day, another blog. In perfect circumstances I would have more than likely wanted several more than two children; I love the purity, innocence and hope children bring into the world. With that said, the chance to be a grandmother has been wonderful.
Last week I had the opportunity for my first solo flight. That is, taking Lillian out into the world all by myself. First things first...load the linen to be delivered into the back of my SUV while Lillian is being quiet. Next - Well, there was the feeding her before we ever got started. Changing the diaper. Putting on warm clothing but not so warm she would simmer inside the snow suit. Finding a little hat for her head. Changing the diaper once more. Checking the diaper bag to make sure I have everything...now what exactly am I supposed to have in here? Gently placing Lillian inside the snow suit with her hat on. Gently placing her in the car seat, trying to convince her that relaxing her legs so I can get the two latches in place without pinching her precious little thighs. Then there is that other latch thingy on her chest that needs to be fastened. Placing a blanket over her and careful to cover her up completely. Now, where is my coat and purse and the diaper bag and 'Oh NO, where are my house keys and car keys?' Can a person even fit through the front door with all of this going on? Ewww, did I hear something, should I seriously stop and try to change a diaper AGAIN! Shhh...she isn't crying, that is a good sign. Finally, we are in the front yard and strolling toward the car. Next, the seat has to snap into place in the base which getting into the car was another affair. At this point, settling into the front seat, turning the ignition, flipping the heat on, making sure the radio isn't as loud and I normally prefer...yes, I am one of those people who drives down the road just singing and praising the Lord at the top of my lungs. I LOVE seat dancing.
On a good day, when the traffic lights are shining there bright green lights on my life, it takes about 20 minutes to arrive at the Club. Today I am strictly adhering to the posted speed limits. Looking both ways at intersections, double checking before pulling out...it might have taken a little more than 20 minutes today, but we have arrived safe and Lillian is asleep. Getting out of the car I realize that my knuckles are pale from gripping the steering wheel. Reaching into the diaper bag for the baby sling, I slip one arm out of my coat to get the sling in place. Unlatching the five-point harness on the car seat isn't any easier than fastening it up. Tenderly cradling Lillian down inside the sling, get my arm back into my coat and then hoisting the first stack of linen onto my shoulder and heading inside to put it away. This is one of the very rare occasions when everyone wants to help me. One of the men even pulls the dirty linen carts out to the car for me and loads them into the back...grandchildren are wonderful!
Honestly, what kind of Grandma would I be if I didn't bestow everyone a tiny peek at Lillian. It just might have taken a few more minutes getting the linen on the shelves that day between stopping to chat and opening the sling to show off my little doll-baby. What is undone must be done up again. I had to go through the whole process again of getting Lillian out of the sling, snapped back into the car seat, sling in the bag, me back into the drivers seat and ever so carefully driving us back home.
Going through all the steps of getting us back into the house, de-coated - de-snow suited, I look at the clock to realize we missed a feeding - hers and MINE, Lillian needs her diaper changed again, a bottle prepared, she is now wide awake and I am ready for a nap!!! The craziest part of all this is that I am still smiling that deep heart-felt smile that only comes from my very core of existence and radiates all the way outward. Alex and Tuck brought a whole new level of love to my life. Now Lillian has added a new level of love to my life. God is the most assuredly AWESOME!
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